Much has been written in this column over the years about one of my daughters and her family, yet I have two daughters and not much space has been reserved to write about or
give inspirational anecdotes about the other one, even though I, of course, love them both. So this month, because it includes Mother's Day, you'll have to indulge this Mom
because this month I want you also to meet Candace, "the other one."Though miles separate us and visits aren't frequent enough, this daughter calls me several times a week
just to see how I'm doing. I love how she will call a few days prior to a visit just to see if I'm excited yet
about spending a few days with her. She works hard yet balances her time to enjoy wonderful friendships and precious time with family. She lives fully.
As Edith Wharton once wrote, "There are two ways of spreading light into the world: to be the candle or
the mirror that reflects it." Once honored as Woman of the Year by a professional women's group, Candace's light is both seen and felt in the world.
On her refrigerator is a magnet with a quote by Abe Lincoln that sums up how she presents herself to humankind: "Whatever you are, be a good one."
One of my most honored moments was when I attended a graduation ceremony a couple of months ago where she was conferred a Master's Degree, because it marked an accomplishment she achieved
from working as smart as she was able and by following choices that supported her dreams. Last year she married a wonderful man and into a loving
family because she knows the importance of sharing her heart as deeply as she can reach. She loves the
people who treat her right as well as the ones who don't just because she can. She has learned not to
make assumptions that bring about pain and instead focuses into joy, into love, and into beauty in creating her own story. She loves truly.
She lives boldly. Even by the time she was six, she had learned to stand up for herself and for principles
that were "right," a practice she continues today even among family members or friends who may not agree
with her. One may feel the need to apologize to her for all the ways in which one fell short, but that wouldn't
be necessary because she never holds onto negativity so, to her, there would be no need for an apology. She has learned that holding onto anger is not optional.
Candace honors her actions as her teachers and respects others who do the same. She holds a belief
system in accordance with another quote by Lincoln: "You cannot help people by doing for them what they
could and should do for themselves." Throughout her life, she has consistently thanked me for my help
but more often has graciously declined it when it was extended when she's felt she could somehow pull through on her own. And she always has.
As I have leapt from one stage of her life to the next, one thing has remained constant--she has always
been happy that I just be her Mom. In an imperfect world where even mothers make mistakes, she has
never required that I be perfect. I love her, I am proud of her, and I just wanted to share her contagiously
smiling face with the world because with Mother's Day being celebrated this month, this lucky Mom is honored to celebrate having this bright light in my life.
May's Monthly MANTRA: 